


Please Stop Leaving Me

by TobytheWise



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Canon Universe, Getting Together, Happy Ending, M/M, Men of Letters Bunker, Misunderstandings, Praying to Castiel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-14
Updated: 2018-08-14
Packaged: 2019-06-27 11:01:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,506
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15684102
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TobytheWise/pseuds/TobytheWise
Summary: Castiel overheard Dean complaining, specifically about all the things he doesn't like about the angel. Castiel is heartbroken and resolves himself to focus on the task at hand and only visit the Winchester's when necessary.Unrequited love hurts....... but is it really unrequited?





	Please Stop Leaving Me

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Dmsilvis](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dmsilvis/gifts).



> This is for Dmsilvis. Thanks again for the art swap. And thanks for being my friend :)

Castiel slowly walks through the bunker in search of the Winchesters. He’d been on the road, searching for answers when it came to opening the portal in search of Mary. He walks towards the kitchen, assuming that’s where he would find the Winchesters but comes to a stop when he hears Dean’s voice. 

“And his stupid hair!” Dean growled. “Why does it always have to look like he just got done being screwed? Like someone’s run their fingers through it a thousand times! You wanna know what else? His freaking outfit! It’s not fair, Sammy! It’s the same freaking outfit every single day, that damn trench coat and tie,” Dean grumbles before murmuring something else that Castiel can’t quite make out. Then Dean continues his ranting, apparently listing everything wrong with Castiel. The angel’s heart beats furiously against his chest causing an ache in his heart. “Don’t even get me started about all the little habits he’s picked up. Like singing to the bees, or always having a cup of coffee with us in the morning even though I’m pretty sure he can’t really taste it, or how he squints when he’s confused and tilts his head like a little puppy. I don’t know if I can take it anymore, Sammy.” Dean finishes with a giant sigh. 

The drown of Dean’s voice continues but all Castiel can hear is the thundering of his own heart in his ears. He feels like he’s drowning, underwater, being washed away. His hand grips his chest where the pain is the worst but it doesn’t help. He’s walking towards the bunker doors without even realizing it. His tears fall freely, who cares if someone sees? Apparently not Dean, that much is certain. 

Castiel is in his truck, driving away. He’s not sure where to go but he can’t stay here. He knows when he’s unwanted, he won’t out stay his welcome. It’s just like when he was human again.

Castiel runs his fingers through his hair as a sob leaves his throat. Dean hates his hair? He doesn’t even do anything with it! This is just how it is. Dean hates his clothes? This is the clothes the empty left him with! He didn’t even choose this. It’s so unfair. 

That night, Castiel lays in his hotel room, staring up at the ceiling. He truly thought things were going to be different this time. Things between them felt so real, so close. And now it’s like everything has slipped between his fingers. He was delusional to think Dean would feel the same for him. It’s all the same, really. He didn’t fit in with his own brothers and sisters, why would he fit in with the Winchesters?

```  
Castiel ignores his phone. He doesn’t wish to hear from anyone. He’ll focus all of his time and energy towards finding Jack. He busies himself as best as he can in order to forget about all the hurtful things he overheard. Even though, every night, the words play over and over in his head. 

Castiel! Please have your ears on right now, man! 

Castiel closes his eyes, listening to what Sam has to say. His phone has been buzzing so much he ended up turning it off. Now he’s hearing Sam praying to him and a small knot begins to twist in his belly.

Dean’s hurt really bad, Cas. We were on a hunt. Dean got taken by a djinn, he was the same kind we had to hunt with Charlie that one time. I’ve got him at the hospital but so far he’s not waking up.

Castiel is up, grabbing his things, and in the truck as he listens to Sam’s panic. “Come on, Sam. Just tell me where you are,” he whispers to himself as he starts up the truck.

Just get here as fast as you can, man.

Castiel finally looks at his phone and finds the address for the hospital they’re at. He drives as fast as he legally can, willing Dean to be okay. His love might not be returned but he’ll still do anything he can to keep Dean alive and well.

```

“Dean,” Castiel murmurs as he walks into the hospital room. Dean is in a hospital bed, looking small and pale and hurt. Castiel’s heart clenches in his chest. He walks up to Dean’s bedside, gently touching Dean’s arm, healing his body. He watches as the color fills Dean’s cheeks once more, the small scratches knit back together. 

Dean’s eyes twitch before fluttering open. He looks around the room before his eyes land on Cas. His lips twitch minutely before a blank mask falls onto his face. 

“Oh. What are you doing here, Cas? I thought you were too busy for us.”

Castiel can hear the hurt in Dean’s voice but he doesn’t understand it. Not in the slightest. Dean doesn’t even like him.

“I’m never too busy to come help you,” Castiel answers truthfully. “Especially when you need me.”

“I wish you didn’t always have to come back,” Dean murmurs, staring at the wall above Castiel’s head. The words are like a stab right into Castiel’s heart. Of course Dean doesn’t want him coming back. 

“I understand,” Castiel says in a monotone. “I can leave you alone now that you don’t need my healing.”

Castiel turns to walk out the doors he came in through when a hand grabs his wrist. He slowly turns back around.

“And there you go again,” Dean whispers, looking small and helpless in the hospital bed. “There you go walking away. Again.”

“Of course I’m leaving. I know when I’m not wanted.”

“Cas, what the hell are you talking about?” 

Castiel looks down where Dean’s hand is still wrapped around his wrist. His heart is pounding so hard he thinks even Dean’s human ears will pick it up. “I know you don’t want me around. I know you don’t even like me, Dean. It’s fine,” he says, hoping his voice sounds steady even though his heart continues to break. “I don’t wish to ever overstay my welcome. So I’ll go try to find Jack and you two can continue hunting and calling me when you need me.”

Castiel finally looks up into Dean’s face and finds the hunter looking at him with confusion. “That’s not what I want at all, Cas. I want you around all the time.”

Now Castiel gets angry because why would Dean lie right to his face like this? It’s just cruel. “Stop lying, Dean,” Castiel grits through his teeth. “I heard you and Sam talking the other night. I heard you tell him all the things you hate about me. All the things that get on your nerves. Things like my hair and my clothes and how I drink coffee with you even though it tastes like molecules. Well, I’m sorry I wanted to spend time with you. I’m sorry that your company makes me happy!” Castiel practically yells. He lets out a breath before whispering, “I just had hope that my company made you happy as well.”

Castiel pulls his hand away from Dean and turns his back to the hunter. He crosses his arms across his chest hoping to still some of the pain there.

“You’re such an idiot, Cas,” Dean whispers. That cuts deep. It hurts. Castiel’s eyes prickle with unshed tears. “You’re an idiot for not saying you were listening in. And you’re an idiot for not staying ten seconds more. If you’d stayed you’d have heard the rest of what I had to say.”

Castiel turns back and Dean’s cheeks are flushed but his eyes are filled with hope. “You’d have heard me say all the things that make me absolutely crazy. How it’s unfair you can get away with only wearing one outfit and making it look good. How your hair looks like you’ve been screwed and how much I wish I was the one who did it. How some of your habits make me go nuts because they’re so endearing I can barely stand it. How all of the things I hate about you are because they make me love you more and more! And the only thing I truly hate about you, Cas,” Dean whispers. “Is how you always seem to be leaving me.”

They stare at each other for a full minute before Castiel’s brain seems to come back online. Dean loves him? Dean loves him? Dean loves him? 

“You love me?” Castiel asks softly. 

“Yes,” Dean says with an exaggerated sigh. Then he rolls his eyes and gestures Cas forward. “Now will you please get your ass over here and kiss me? And will you please stop leaving me?”

“Yes!” Castiel declares as he storms over to Dean’s bed, trench coat flapping with the speed of his movements. He pulls Dean forward by the back of his neck and plants a kiss firmly to his lips. It stays chaste and solid but it’s everything that Castiel has always hoped it would be. 

“I’ll stay. Forever.”


End file.
